Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Now THIS Is How Golf Should Be Played

Long Beach, CA

I've always thought of golf as the sport of old men and guys who don't know how to box. The kind of sport where disputes are handled with decorum and grace, or a five iron upside the head.

Apparently, I was wrong. A dispute in the clubhouse at the Heartwell Golf Park in Long Beach spilled out into the parking lot, ending with four people in the hospital for non-life threatening gunshot wounds. By non-life threatening, I assume that at least one person got shot in the ass.

If I'd known this was how you played golf, I'd have picked up clubs and a 12-gauge a long time ago.

6 comments:

angie said...

There's always Cowboy Golf. You know, where you use meadow muffins as tees and ride a horse (or a mule) to the holes.

'Course, sounds like you've got yer Urban Cowboy golf crap going on over there in la-la land. Figures.

Stephen Blackmoore said...

Hey now. I'll take bullets over cowshit any day of the week.

Angry in L.A. said...

I thought golf was supposed to be a relaxing sport?

JT Ellison said...

I'm a firm believer in judging a man's character by how he approaches his golf game. You find out who is really a cheater, who has a temper, who is the mild mannered easy going type -- it's the greatest equalizer. Guns? That's just wrong, on every level.

Stephen Blackmoore said...

No, no, you have it backwards. GUNS are the great equalizer. My biggest problem with golf... as well as baseball, football and hockey come to think of it, is that it''s just not violent enough. Even Archery Golf is kind of lame.

I think adding firearms to the game is a great idea. But then I was upset when they added rules to ultimate fighting.

Anonymous said...

Hockey.... hmmmm... hockey would be much more fun if there were no penalties and the stick blades were sharpened metal... and definitely no padding.... and who needs points anyway.... wait a minute... that reminds me of another arena sport. All we need now are lions. Keep the ice though for comic relief...