Wednesday, February 11, 2009

In The Twenties They Just Jumped Out of Windows

Los Angeles, CA

With the economy melting faster than Joan Rivers' face under a klieg light it's not all that surprising that some people are going a little crazy. Most of them, though, don't get to go crazy in $125,000.00 cars.

Mustafa Mustafa (isn't that kind of like Smith Smith?), driving a rather nice Bentley, took cops on a low speed car chase through the city Monday night that lasted several hours until he finally stopped the car and shot himself. According to police, "He was distraught over financial stuff."

Yeah, who isn't?

Okay, people, rich or poor, I don't care. Stop it.

Seriously. Stop it. Y'all are going a little too bugfuck for my taste and I'd really wish you'd just put down the gun, take an Ativan and think things through.

Look, lots of us have had the desire to eat a bullet at one point or another. If only to just make everything fucking stop.

Financial ruin is not the end of the world. Unless you're in for a hundred large to Big Wahine, that Samoan loan shark in Gardena who likes his boys plump and pretty, it's probably not as bad as you think it is. And even he, in all his mumu'ed glory, is usually willing to negotiate. Probably just take a kidney.

And the car chases? Not a cry for help. No, really, they're not. They're the mark of a narcissistic mindset that wants the world to know just how fucking bad everything is. This is L.A. You get more than three cops on your ass at any speed and you're on the evening fucking news. Everyone knows your name.

Even me. And that's really about as low as you can get.

5 comments:

Bill Cameron said...

I tried to get the police to come after me in a low-speed chase, but they say I was driving a Geo and got bored. They also weren't impressed when I finally pulled over and hit myself in the face with a pie.

I think I'm doing it wrong.

ron oliver said...

i've been reading your blog the past few days - you, sir, are bloody brilliant.
www.ronoliversfabulouslife.blogspot.com

Sophie Littlefield said...

i found that bizarrely cheering. my husband lost his job, our kid is making us nuts, i'm at an epic low, and nothing else has cheered me up in two weeks. so thanks. i'd buy you a beer if i could.

and i miss you, bill cameron. :(

Gerard Saylor said...

Hey, Sophie's upcoming novel looks interesting. A direct comparison to Crumley's style and settings always grabs my attention.

Midtown Miscreant said...

I've never understood the mindset of those who take their own lives, or others, simply because they lost, money, job, house, etc. A day above ground is a good one, period.