It's Easier When You're Not Stupid

Laguna Beach, CA

If you're going to fake your death there are a few things that you need to do.  Leave the area.  Get a new name.  Get a new bank account.  Don't get caught.

Last September John Sung Park, 29, disappeared while diving in Laguna Beach. Police didn't really buy it.  Figured he had faked his own death because he was just about to be sentenced on burglary, theft, forgery and drug charges in Orange County and had an open drug warrant in Los Angeles.

Once this was done, Mr. park did the smart thing.  He laid low, stayed out of trouble and didn't...

Oh, sorry.  He was caught cheating at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas.  They frown on that sort of thing. I 'm thinking either he caved and told them his name, or they ran his prints.  Considering the stupid factor here I'm going to go with option 1. 

Extradition to the OC is in the cards for Mr. Park.  Hah!  See, I made a funny.  I'm a giver.  Give, give, give.  Never take.  This is what I do for you people.  Because I love you.

So now he's looking at all those other charges plus faking an emergency and gambling fraud.

Good luck, Mr. Park.  Next time be more convincing.  If you leave a smoking corpse after crashing your car into a transformer cops are more likely to believe you're dead.  No, I don't know how you survive it.  What, you want me to think of everything?