Saturday, May 21, 2011

Et Tu, Fat Louie?

Santa Ana, CA

If one guy stabs you it might just be that you're in the wrong place at the wrong time.

But when fifteen people stab you, it's hard not to take it personally.

A man was stabbed multiple times outside Malone’s Bar and Grill in Santa Ana this morning by a small mob of at least five people and possibly as many as fifteen. Reports are hazy. Witnesses were pretty lit.

Man, what do you have to do to piss off that many people with knives? What, was he about to be crowned King of the Tweakers and his favorite dealer decided to shank him?

"Beware the week after the ides of May!" Yeah, that doesn't really work, does it?

No word yet on whether the man's attackers then ran through the streets yelling, "Liberty, freedom, and enfranchisement," though I have hopes.

6 comments:

Daniel Garon said...

Beautiful story, brought a tear to my eye.

Mike Dennis said...

I think it's more likely they ran through the streets saying, "How much did we get?"

michael said...

Wow, flash mob with knives.

Ben said...

Holy shit, fifteen???????? Was it a nihilist sect?

JD Rhoades said...

Y'know that would be a great opening line for a novel.

Stephen Blackmoore said...

That's what I'm thinking. Already got it started.